Miraculous LadyJade
by ShyKylee
Summary: What if Master Fu had chosen 2 different people to wield the Ladybug and Cat Noir miraculouses? What if these people were supposed to play a game? Dave/Jade
1. Jade

She had never seen so many people in her entire life. The crowded airport was bustling with people, coming and going to so many different places. Jade just stood there in awe, studying every face she saw. On the island where she had been raised the only faces she had ever seen were, her grandpa's, her own, and the many pictures of the blue women that her grandpa kept around the house. Here there were so many people of such diversity and she had never been so excited in her life. Of course she was too distracted to pay attention to the two faces that she was supposed to be looking for, that of her cousin John and his father, but amidst the many faces that has previously captured her full attention she noticed and elderly Asian man hunched over a cane. He was having trouble retrieving a hefty ancient looking trunk from the baggage claim, so much so that he looked as if he would fall over from exertion at any possible moment. While Jade did notice her green, patch covered duffle bag from the corner of her eye, she deemed helping the man as more important.

"Would you like me to help you with that?" She offered politely when she approached him.

"Oh thank you my dear," he replied with a slight French accent, "that would be very kind of you"

Jade gently hefted the suitcase to the floor, it was heavy but because it looked so ancient and valuable she was careful to not damage it. "Here you go sir, do you need any more help?"

"Oh no, thank you have helped me all I need." He replied cryptically as he placed a hand on her bag that had just come around the baggage wheel. "Now don't keep them waiting." He quickly turned and blended into the crowds.

"Wait sir-" she spared just a moment to glance down as she grabbed her luggage, but by the time she looked up he was gone. "How did he?" She muttered to herself, so many questions raced through her mind. Where did he go? How had he known someone was waiting for her? And why had he sounded so cryptic? Any more of her thoughts were interrupted by being nearly tackled to the ground with an unexpected hug.

"Jade!" Exclaimed John, his voice filled with absolute excitement. "I'm so happy you're finally here! I can't wait for school to actually start this year, and you to finally meet my friends." He finished with a devilish grin.

"Lemme guess, you want my help pranking all of them" she teased.

"Well duh, we need to put all that science know-how to _some_ use." He replied poking her temple. "Now follow me, dad's waiting in the car." Together they exited the crowded airport, and the memory of the old man had been completely forgotten.

* * *

After a night of junk food and watching all of John's favorite movies (every single one starred Nicholas Cage), the dark haired duo decided to settle into bed. Jade let her eyes wander around the unfamiliar guest room, not used to seeing white walls uncovered by her plethora of colorful posters. It was still a very nice room with a decent sized bed covered in a green comforter, her favorite color, and a large window mostly shaded by a large tree for plenty of privacy. Besides that the room was rather plain, but she had been prepared for that. She unzipped her bag to reveal a stash of squiddles, unfortunately she hadn't been able to bring all of them but she had managed to squeeze in all of her favorites. Yet as she began placing the colorful toys around her, some tangled together and some not, her hand brushed something hard. As she retracted her hand she discovered an octagonal red and black box that she had never seen before.

"What the…" she muttered as she examined the small object in her hand. She traced the carved markings that were vaguely reminiscent of Chinese art. Finding nothing incredibly unusual about the outside of the box, she opened it.

A small explosion of bright pink light erupted from box, causing Jade to lose hold of it in her surprise. Yet as the box dropped to her be, the light remained suspended in the air in front of her. Even squinting, she could see that the light was moving. It was stretching and twisting into the shape of… something. As suddenly as it came, the light abruptly disappeared leaving in its place a small red creature.

"Hello Jade, my name is Tikki."


	2. Dave

On the long list of the worst days of his life, this had to be in the top 22 _at least_. Dave thought as he trudged up the 20 flights of stairs leading up to the apartment he shared with his pain of an older brother. He was covered head to toe in scratches and bird crap, carrying only the remains of the plastic bag that had once held a loaf of bread. One of the few rules that actually existed in the Strider household was that if you ever wanted to eat anything besides Doritos and orange soda, you had to buy it yourself. Being the growing boy that he was and with a few bucks in his pocket, Dave's brilliant idea of buying sandwich ingredients had sure blown up in his face. Now instead of enjoying that sweet grilled cheese he'd been dreaming of, he once again would have to rummage through a fridge full of shitty swords for some even shittier cheese covered chips. At least his Bro was busy today and he wouldn't have to make use of those shitty swords in another one of his 'sparring sessions'.

As he approached his apartment door, Dave reached into his pocket for his keys. Instead of the cool metal he had been expecting, his hand came around something hard and much larger than a single key. Pulling it from his jeans, he discovered that it was a small wooden box covered in oriental designs. "What the…" he muttered as he unlocked the door, still examining the strange box and wondering where it had come from. As he finally reached the confines of his room, his conquest for food completely forgotten, Dave's mind wandered to the earlier afternoon…

* * *

 _He was extremely pleased with his haul from the local grocery store, with his $5 he'd gotten plenty of bread and cheese for the week as well as multiple bottles of apple juice that had been on sale. If this wasn't his lucky day he didn't know what would be. As he headed on his way home the beginnings of a smile almost prickled at the corners of his mouth. Almost. Yet his good quickly came to to an end as the event transpired before him._

 _A small Chinese man sat on the bench, feeding bread crumbs to crows. While that normally would have been a nice scene to witness, the man was running out of crumbs and more and more crows were approaching. The last of the crumbs fell to the ground, quickly devoured by the inky black birds yet apparently that didn't satisfy them. They wanted more, and something Dave had never witnessed happened, they attacked._

 _Of course Dave jumped in the defend the old man, using his grocery bags as weapons. Yet food was exactly what those demon birds wanted, so they quickly tore into the thin plastic, littering the ground with food. Bottles and packages busted open, making it all inedible, yet when the avian attackers noticed their favorite treat they finally relinquished their scratch attack on Dave._

" _That was very brave of you." said the old man in what sounded like a french accent. "I must thank you for keeping those birds from attacking me, but I do apologize for what has happened to you." he gestured to the scratches covering Dave's body and then to the ruined food on the ground._

" _No big deal." Dave replied, acting as nonchalant as ever. "I didn't want it anyways." satisfied that the man was no longer in any danger, he picked up the remain of the plastic bread bag a started home. Only to be assaulted with a shower of bird crap…_

* * *

His flashback ended and Dave sneered in disdain at the realization that he was still covered in feces. Heading to the shower, he tossed the box on his bed and completely forgot all about it.

It wasn't until the late hours of the night that Dave decided to finally go to bed. He had spent the rest of the day drawing stupid comics about shitty birds and I Ming his friend John about the arrival of his distant cousin. All Dave had to say about that was "oh god now you have a sidekick." When finally settling beneath his sheets he felt something sharp dig into the small of his back, reaching behind himself he uncovered the previously forgotten box. He absentmindedly traced the patterns weaving their way across the surface as sleep failed to consume him. Finally curiosity got the better of him and he opened the box.

A bright green light erupted from inside, nearly blinding Dave due to the lack of his sunglasses. As the light shifted and faded away it revealed an incredibly small black cat, only visible due to the dim light of his computer screen. As impossibly small as it was, it was even more impossible that it was floating in mid-air. Dave's fascination drove him to reach up in an attempt to touch it, when impossibility drove through the roof and into the stratosphere.

"Yo I'm Plagg, got any food?" It spoke.

* * *

A/N: Heads up that I may never update this ever again because I'm honestly pretty terrible at finishing anything I start. Hopefully you liked the first couple chapters. I know this idea probably isn't original but after spending an entire evening binge-watching ML and homestuck ending recently, I couldn't get this AU out of my head. If I do continue this, I'm hoping to add all of the homestuck cast, and of course they must all be akumatized so I'm welcoming any character/akuma suggestions in the reviews. I have a few in mind already, but I might just like yours better.

-Ky


	3. Jack of Spades

Holy fucking shit. Is this actually an update? Hell fucking yes it is.

I would like to apologize WAY in advance (or maybe its late w/e) but I'm not exactly a writer, hell I don't even have an actual plot in mind for this. So sorry if I don't really update this as much as you'd like or the characterization is off. I'll try to continue this as much as I can.

Also I would love some akuma suggestions for other HS characters, I already got a great one for Aradia that'll probably show up in chapter 5 or so.

* * *

"They've awoken." stated a deep gravely voice. In the pitch blackness the only sounds besides the voice were the swish of fabric against the floor and the repeated tapping of something metal. With a click a mechanic whirring filled the air, light finally filtered into the room through a large circular window. The sudden change of lighting spooked the thousands of butterflies laying dormant in the room, causing them to flutter around the large figure in a tornado of shining white wings. With a tap of his shining gold cane they dispensed, allowing him a clear view of the entire city. "Finally, my plan can begin."

* * *

A man slumped against the the wall of a greasy alleyway, his despair was almost tangible as he cradled a deck of cards close to his chest. Despite his usual tough demeanor, he wept softly, recounting how he had just gambled away everything. His money, his home, even his prized pocket knife, and the simple ring he had been saving for the right moment. They were all gone just because he hadn't known when to stop. Instead of winning big like he'd hoped, all of his possessions now belonged to a smug gangster in a red hat. He had nowhere to go, he already owed all of his friends due to this addiction, and there was no way he could face the woman he loved. His life was over, and as he dwelled on that fact a single black butterfly landed on the top card of his deck.

* * *

"Jack of spades," The deep bellowed into the possessed man's mind. "My name is Lord English, and I can help you get everything back. As long as you do one thing for me in return." He didn't even need to hear the man's affirmation to know that he had accepted the deal. Afterall, what poor soul would reject the ability for revenge. A bone-chilling laugh rose from his throat, echoing throughout the large room. It was time, his plan was quickly taking shape and his timing was perfect. He was sure that there was only but a slim chance he would fail.

* * *

All of the high school movies John had forced her to watch had not prepared her at all. Not once had she seen a group of attractive girls walking down the middle of the hallway in slow motion. Nor had any of the "jocks" in her classes seemed dumb, if anything they actually seemed more applied than most students. All of her teachers and the principal were extremely nice, and at lunch she hadn't had to search for a clique to it in with, in fact she hadn't even noticed any defining characteristics of typical "cliques", everyone had been more than willing to let her sit with them even if she had just settled with John and his friends in the end.

"So what's going on?" she couldn't help asking as she placed her tray of food on the table. It honestly didn't even look that bad. "Where are the popular girls, and the mathletes? Why haven't I been hearing anything about crazy kegger parties? When's the prom?" she droned on, trying to list every movie aspect that had been absent from her first day so far.

"Exactly how many movies did he make you watch?" Rose asked with a raised eyebrow. John tried unsuccessfully to cover up his snickering behind his hand.

"Seven. He probably would have made is eight if he hadn't insisted that we watch the bonus features too." Jade replied with a shrug.

"Oh lord I'm surprised you're even still alive." Dave cut in, sitting down at the table himself. "I do believe that is a form of torture in some countries." He added.

"You just can't appreciate the true cinematic masterpieces that are high school movies." John muttered, almost sounding actually offended.

"I'm sorry John, _Mean Girls_ truly is a work of art." Rose replied with only a twitch at the corner of her lip.

* * *

Now this _definitely_ didn't happen in high school movies. Jade thought as a man dressed similar to an inhuman court jester crashed through the window of her science class and seized her teacher by the throat. He held a card with razor sharp edges against the terrified man's face drawing a small stream of blood. What the jester said to the teacher could not be heard, but when another student snapped out of their shock to scream he whipped around to finally notice the class.

"Shut your FACE!" He growled as he flung a card at the screaming student. When it hit her classmate on the forehead, the teenager was literally sucked into the card only leaving the king of diamonds in their place printed with the student's terrified face.

After that the entire class erupted into chaos. Some students screamed for help and other rushed towards the exit. Luckily Jade was swept up with the latter, giving her the chance to duck into the thankfully empty bathrooms. She opened her backpack whispering the words that 'Tikki' had told her.

"Spots on"

* * *

Dave heard the screaming from across the school. Normally he would have payed it no mind, figuring that that some classroom was just getting too excited but the small floating cat, or 'Plagg' as it called itself had told him that something dangerous was coming and that it would be his and one other person's job to stop it. He didn't understand why he had been chosen, he wasn't a hero and literally anybody else would be more suited for this than him. In fact the night before he'd tried to leave the box in his brother's room only to wake up with the silver ring that was inside on his finger. He couldn't back out of this it seemed, so he might as well own up to it.

By this point his teacher had noticed the screaming that seemed to be getting closer and looked unsure of what to do. While frantically trying to calm down the increasingly panicked class, she didn't notice Dave slip out of the door.

Stepping into the hall, he was nearly trampled by a crowd of teenagers rushing to find an exit. All of his instincts told him to do the same but instead he ducked behind the nearest industrial sized trash can.

* * *

"Claws out!" John heard from around the corner. Despite it being towards the obvious danger that everyone was escaping from, his curiosity got the better of him as he dragged his friend Rose towards the source of the shout.

"John, what on earth are you-" she shouted only to pause at the sight that lay before them. In front of them stood a blonde boy probably no older than the other two surprised teens.

This wouldn't have been peculiar if he hadn't been dressed head to toe in what looked like black leather and with a pair of cat ears perched on his head. He said nothing as the other two teens stared at him in awe and shock for multiple minutes. When another scream broke the silence it also broke the spell that had entranced them all, the leather clad cat boy turned and sprinted towards the disturbance leaving John and Rose to contemplate what on earth had just happened.

"John, was that-"

"A REAL FUCKING SUPERHERO!"

* * *

Yeah so sorry about there being no fight yet, this was more character introduction than anything. I have started the next chapter so expect it at...some point.

Ok, last thing: I've decided to change their costumes to fit their characters (and god tiers) a bit better. I'll have drawn the designs by the time I release the next chapter but I would still live to see other people's interpretations as well. Just go ahead and tag it as miraculous ladyjade on tumblr so I can see it.

Thanks for reading!


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